Throbert's Theatre of Thinkologizing main page


30 September 2002

Did you know that shoddily-constructed stuffed animals may pose a safety hazard to infants and toddlers with certain rare but serious genetic abnormalities? It's disturbing but true. For instance, while the child has Bosco Bear's head in its mouth, with serrated teeth seeking to tear a surgically-precise incision in the bear's carotid artery so that swollen venom sacs can pump in neurotoxic saliva causing almost instant paralysis and eventual liquefaction of muscle tissues, one of the baby's dewclaws may snag on a large piece of stuffing and fling it onto the gas range, where it might be ignited by the pilot light and cause what could have ended up being a tragic kitchen fire.

Please pass this warning to everyone on your mailing list and if you know how to set up an online Internet email petition for submission to Congress and the UN, which unfortunately I don't, please create one and forward the URL so I can link to it!

Thank you.

posted by Throbert | 9/30/2002 01:03:00 PM |
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